Saturday, May 16, 2009

A Nice, Safe Post

Because of all the negative feedback I received from my last blog entry, I have decided to write a sweet, innocuous one that no one can complain about.

I like vanilla pudding. Do you like vanilla pudding? I like it because not only does it taste good, it makes me happy. If you’re not feeling happy, maybe you should try vanilla pudding?

Puppies make me happy too. I wonder if they make you feel good? Some of them have big, floppy ears and that’s cute! Sometimes a puppy will bite and that's not so good. When puppies bite you, it can hurt! But it’s all right. That doesn’t make them bad puppies.

I like the people. They are fun and nice! When I meet another one, I smile and sometimes, if I’m lucky, they smile back. When they smile back, I feel warm inside. When they don’t, I still think they are special. I just don’t feel as warm inside.

The sun feels good!!! I like it on my skin. I wonder if you feel the same? If you don’t, that’s all right. You don’t have to feel the same as me. We’re different and that’s all right!

If I’m eating vanilla pudding in the sunlight, I’m extra happy. If a puppy comes along, well then I smile so hard, it hurts. But it hurts in a good way – don’t worry! I’m all right.

And Pearl Jam sucks.


Joseph said...

I am so angry right now that I am trembling.

How can a world exist where a person like you, who like vanilla pudding, is allowed to write a blog? Your hands should be broken with a hammer. Then maybe, during the long hours of painful physical therapy required to regain full use of your hands, you will come to understand the centrality of CHOCOLATE pudding to the perfect order of the universe.

Until then...


Jules said...

LOL you sarcastic little bitch. :)