Friday, December 22, 2006

Sexy Dream Last Night with Grouchy Guy pictured below


Yes, I know - I did vote him as one of the most grouchy famous people to meet - David Walliams from Little Britain. For those of you who havent' seen Little Britain, it is a big hit in Britain, akin to Monty Python and you need to watch it now. These two guys - Matt Lucas and David Walliams - play all the lead roles. They dress up as women alot, as all proper British comedies require.

I quickly developed a crush on David (as I like to call him), though I assumed he was gay - again, maybe because he is in dresses all the time. But, in real life, apparently, he is STRAIGHT. Like he likes girls. That's really exciting for me...a girl. A grown girl. In my dream, he is still gay, though...follow?

Okay, on to the dream, because I'm sure by now you are just dying of curiousity. Just dying.

The Dream: We are at some apartment together where he and I and Matt Lucas live. We are very comfortable with our living arrangement and with one another - perfect chemistry. It is morning and I jump into bed with Matt Lucas. David Walliams lie on the floor next to the bed, because he is too tall to fit. But we are all happy and cozy.

Next thing I remember, David Walliams is dancing with me, very closely. He is dressed impeccably - as he does in real life - and dancing close to me...oh, I said that already. Um...wow. He smells so good too. Too good. God, good. He was humming a song in my ear, a very pleasant old song. I break away for a second, because I'm thinking "Huh...you're gay, right? I'm confused."

He then starts walking toward me, forcing me to walk backwards. He kisses my neck and around my ears. I feel like I could faint from all this physical stimuli. And he...is so vampire-like, tall, strange, an inexplicable power - dark, sexy and thoroughly Intoxicating. He reaches under my dress and touches me between my legs. At this point, my knees start to go week and I almost fall. He catches me and explains how he is in fact gay and that's about as far as he can go, as a gay man. I say "That's fine," barely able to breathe.

And it was fine. Because I was dizzy and high from it. Too high from it. Besides him being so sexy, there was this taboo element - of a gay man and his suddenly straight desire...for me, no less! I woke up and thanked God for such a dream. It was sexy and even though he's on my grouchy list, he's my new boyfriend. Someone please tell him. Hurry. Please.

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